Chasing a girl is hard work. But when you’ve decided to let her go and she still wanders into your path, then it gets harder to stick to your initial decision.
I had an eye for this girl some time back. We were members of this university cultural club. I tried to catch her attention, and I did, but at some point we had the awkward chat and I understood that we could not get together for some reasons involving her family. It wasn’t a big blow or anything as I had foreseen and prepared myself for such an outcome. Yet, fate kept pushing us together, numerous times.
The most recent of which involved an event which she was helping to organise. The committee had wanted to sing a song to begin the event, and to make it less dry, she had come up with the idea of putting a montage together with the song’s lyrics. The committee then tasked her with creating this montage. So far so good, except that she had never used video editing software before.
She could have easily approached her other closer friends, people who were very skilled in videography. But she approached me, a person she barely spoke to. Why? My guess is that because I had done a similar project the year before when I was still in the club. But I didn’t get it. Isn’t it better to approach your own subordinates whom you are closer to and are, in this case, without doubt better qualified?
But she insisted that I teach her how to do the montage. As we had differing schedules, I essentially created a 3 part video tutorial (in 20 minutes haha) and gave her some storyboard ideas. And from the final product it is evident that she closely followed the tutorial.
She texted me several times to trouble shoot things, and after completing each draft, asked me to review it, which I did. But again, it was a weird thing to do, to ask a committee outsider for their comments. But I pointed out the little details and helped out where I could. After all, she is my friend.
I’m not trying to say that maybe she still harbours feelings for me, that’s why she asked me for help. Nor that the montage came out because of my input. Actually she did most of the work herself. But why ask me for tips?
Come show day, I arrived on time. She was with the rest of the committee, who were receiving guests and she quickly waved at me and smiled before turning to the next person. Alright, maybe I’ll speak to her after the event, I thought to myself.
So we settled down at the back of the huge auditorium with my group of friends. As they began the event, the emcees introduced the intro song, she and another comes up to sing it! She had created the lyrical montage and she was also singing it? Why didn’t she tell me?
Those 2 minutes were awkward, to say it simply. I kept thinking, what could have been if only we had broken the family barrier. It didn’t help one bit that she kept glancing and smiling at me throughout the song. Remember, the auditorium was big and I was a distance away.
As we sat down, I was wondering if she had been looking at our group of mutual friends instead. Or perhaps she was looking at her parents and little niece. But those piercing eyes had looked directly at me, and those groups were not in her line of sight.
I’ve always wanted a girl to look at me that way. It wasn’t the first time she looked at me this way. But each time she did, it was a solemn reminder that we may never be together, and I found myself looking away. She is this goody two-shoes person who has a high standing amongst her peers, and here I was, a diaper boy, waiting for the rains to pour in the Sahara. Yea, I feel that I could be her equal on several parameters, but the family factor really killed it.
Cos I know from observing my family, a girl without her parents support will never be happy, and I didn’t want to disturb that equilibrium of hers for me. Besides, she’ll probably marry a high standing doctor or lawyer, who cares about engineers these days. And all of these doesn’t factor in my inherent ABDL wish list in a girl, which I frankly, have no idea whether I should keep or throw.
My only thought at this moment is that the correct girl will show herself when the time is right. And until that day arrives, I just have to study hard and shore up my finances.